Okay maybe the title is a little unfair, but I was married to a German for over 12 years, my three kids are half German, so that makes me 1/8 retard by marriage. I love my E60, such a joy, accelerating through the twisties while the L7 system blast CCR, sunroof open, shifting through the gears as if they were made of warm butter. I gave that car the best of everything. Nothing but Chevron Supreme, a little extra Techtron added after a good workout. Top of the line synthetic oil. Washed waxed and Polished to perfection. And what do I get? Tarnished memories and anxiety. Lately I'm struck by how this car and my ex-wife are exactly the same... spoiled rotten! More broadly, ex-wife and BMW engineers are cut from the same course itchy German cloth. Brilliant in so many technical ways, but absolute morons when it comes to Common Sense. Dynamic Drive, Vanos, adaptive and active everything but then you take every module worth over $1,500 and place them directly in areas that will flood if you are crappy rubber seals were to fail. Brilliant! Anyway just wanted to sipping my coffee stare at my car and say hi