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Thread: Don't You Just Love A Good Bulls***ter?

  1. #1
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    Don't You Just Love A Good Bulls***ter?

    The following is a real conversation that I actually had with a real person, and I found it too funny not to share.

    There is a kid I went to high school with who lives around the block from me who is really into bragging and he knows I'm into cars. So naturally, he occasionally enjoys bragging to me about what car he is driving.

    He stopped by the other day to show off his new ride, a 2004(ish) Impala that appeared to be a base model with window tint that turned purple and hubcaps that were spray painted black.

    I was in the driveway doing a brake job for a friend for pizza and beer. Neighbor starts walking down the driveway and says "What do you think of my new car?"

    Not wanting to be rude and tell him my honest opinion of it, I politely lied and said "Oh it's nice, is that an Impala?", all while knowing full-well what it was.

    He replied, " It's actually the Impala GT Midnight/Blackout/SomeMadeupName Edition."

    I said "Wow, that must be nice."

    "Yeah, it's got the 8V (V8?) engine and it's a manual", he told me.

    I could cleary see through the faded purple tint that it was a column shift automatic.

    "Wow, thats great, can you pop the hood?", I asked.

    He replied "I would, but my mechanic told me not to until the turbos are broken in."

    I said, "Oh, I see. Maybe some other time."

    He got back in the car to leave and said "Yeah if you ever want to race sometime, let me know!"

    I said, "Okay, I'll be sure to do that!"

    I definately won't do that, figure I'll save him the embarrassment. After he left, I burst out laughing for about 3 minutes. My buddy who I was doing the brake job for doesn't know anything about cars, so he didn't really understand why I was laughing so hard, I'm pretty sure he thought I lost my mind for a minute.

  2. #2
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    Sounds to me like he's not a good bulls***ter, but whoever he bought it from/his mechanic is.

  3. #3
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    Now, now, now. You can't tell through purple window tint if it's a column shift automatic or manual. I mean, it could be a three on the tree. I can't imagine who would do such a thing, but there are no stick shift Impalas built in the 80s.

  4. #4
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    Sounds similar to this guy



    Ferd Mustang GT-r , turbo rotary powered and shit.

  5. #5
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  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nanniepoo View Post
    Sounds to me like he's not a good bulls***ter, but whoever he bought it from/his mechanic is.
    Ahh but if you can't spot a good one then if you can spot one, they aren't a good one.
    No warranty of any kind implied or given and no liability for any loss, damage or injury, no matter how incurred accepted.

  7. #7
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    Good or bad, I genuinely love these clueless braggarts. They are the most beautiful form of comedy there is IMO.

  8. #8
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    Theres a local gent that insists his 270x came turbo through the variable valve timing. Then looked at me like i was an alien when i asked where the turbo was while his hood was popped. After a minute of staring at the engine bay he came to the epiphany that he meant supercharged amd tried to say the altinator was the supercharger... Another guy i hired at the foundery for shits and giggles, because i had really gotten into the office on netflix that week, tried to convince the group of mechanics that if you use a diesel fuel pump it will make any engine spin like 2000 times a minute. (Which by the way he said it made it sound superrrrrr fast). He also once convinced another closely intelligable employee that his subaru legacy was a wrx in desquise. They managed to get a fart can on it. A couple wrx badges and one of those turbo fan intake proppeler. Cyclone deals and insist it now had wrx power. .... Im ashamed of where i live.
    Nobody would recertify these machines after somebody screwed with them without any visibility into what they did.

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  9. #9
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    I almost shit when I watched the 610 HP Challenger Video. The saddest part is that guy was a grown adult who felt so insecure he had to lie to total strangers about his totally-acceptable-in-stock-form car to feel accepted. Lamborghini exhaust, gtfo. I love how Lamborghini is the benchmark for 'cool car' for non-car people.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by OldBavarian View Post
    "Wow, thats great, can you pop the hood?", I asked.

    He replied "I would, but my mechanic told me not to until the turbos are broken in."
    Priceless!

    I had a kid tell me his S10 custom mini-truck was turbo. The kid whom he bought it from had previously paid $$$ to have all kinds of crap in the engine bay chromed, and he was sure the chrome rectangular upper section of the intake was 'the turbo'. I nodded and smiled.
    Eat, drink, and be merry - for tomorrow we drive.

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by JEC928 View Post
    I nodded and smiled.
    This is basically where I'm at with these kind of people, they are only lying to themselves.

    I seriously love the 610 HP Challenger guy who claims to have replaced "the headies and the hammer" and "installed the supercharger inside the intake". I also love that he claims it "is as fast as it looks" and yet at the same time "it is a sleeper".
    Last edited by OldBavarian; 08-23-2017 at 01:55 PM.

  12. #12
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    What are these turbo things people seem to want to have ? Is it like having nitro ?
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  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by Butters Stoch View Post
    What are these turbo things people seem to want to have ? Is it like having nitro ?
    Here is all you need to know:
    Eat, drink, and be merry - for tomorrow we drive.

  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by Butters Stoch View Post
    What are these turbo things people seem to want to have ? Is it like having nitro ?
    Nitroglycerin?

    Gave away my BMWs, driving a VW and an Audi now.

  15. #15
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    That kid is probably still laughing about the gullible BMW owner.

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