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Thread: 2003 540i Red Light Drags

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2016
    Location
    Houston, TX
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    0
    My Cars
    2003 BMW 540iA

    2003 540i Red Light Drags

    Hey y'all this is not only my first post in Kill Stories, but this is my first post on bimmerforums! I've been lurking here a while and decided to share a fun little story from a few weeks ago. Hope y'all like it!

    So I'm leaving my apartment one Tuesday morning, going about business as usual. On my morning commute, there's this one stupid red light that's two lanes at the light, and then immediately after the intersection it narrows to one lane, and neither is designated as a turn only lane (gotta love Houston roads). So to avoid confusion and having to slam on the brakes, when I'm one of the first two at the light I make it my mission to dart out in front of the other car, and I always succeed.

    On this particular Tuesday, I'm the first one to the light, and I get in the left lane so people who wanna turn right are able to do so. This woman in a V6 Honda Accord pulls up to my right, and makes a point to be further forward than I am. I let it go, figuring she was turning right and just wanted to see around me, but no, she passed up multiple opportunities, and is still sitting there. It dawns on me that she expects to be in front of me when the light turns green, and I just can't let this happen. So I pull forward a bit more (I was a little behind the line, now my front tires are sitting on the far edge of the line). She responds by pulling forward more, determined to beat me.

    "Well alright," I say to myself. "If she wants a race I'll give her one. Even if she doesn't, I'm still giving her one." I push my bone stock 540i's autotragic into Sport mode (poor thing doesn't even have the Steptronic ). I look to my left at the pedestrian crosswalk counter, so I'll know when the light is about to turn green. A couple seconds before it does, I hold the brake firmer and give it a little gas. When the light turns green, I dump the brake and I'm gone! There's a little chirp from the back tires as my car's almost-300-hp engine attempts to break the mediocre traction provided by my 225s pawing for grip. I roll into the throttle at first and once I have a little more speed I push the pedal to the floor. I'm out in front before the end of the intersection. VANOS seems to kick in at 3500 rpm, and my lead grows as the road becomes one lane. By this point I'm going over 40 mph so I'm thankful for my e39's high speed stability. When the Honda looks like a Hot Wheels car in my mirror, only then do I lift.

    You might be thinking, "Congrats you beat a Honda Accord, whoopty-do", or "You idiot, this is why insurance rates for males under 25 are so high!" and you'd be right on both counts. But that doesn't matter. It also doesn't matter that she wasn't even trying to outrun me, or that she probably spent the rest of the day wondering what was wrong with that idiot in the BMW. Ask any ricer, any real ricer. It doesn't matter if the other guy's racing or not; a win's a win.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2004
    Location
    Montreal
    Posts
    248
    My Cars
    E90 330i
    haha had good time reading your story, congrats on the "win"

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2015
    Location
    Tennessee
    Posts
    1,005
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    BMW
    I felt like I was right there at the intersection watching this unfold. Nice wordplay. Round of applause for your win.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    Great Lakes
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    3,423
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    BMW
    lol. How much older are you than your car? 4 - 5 years?


  5. #5
    Join Date
    Aug 2016
    Location
    Houston, TX
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    0
    My Cars
    2003 BMW 540iA
    8 actually, almost 9, but I probably have the maturity level I did when I was 16 lol. The only difference is back then I was driving an old POS Toyota pickup, so I couldn't do stuff like this (I definitely would have if I could have!).

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jan 2017
    Location
    Abingdon, MD
    Posts
    98
    My Cars
    2003 BMW Z4 3.0i
    Great story! I've been there a million times. Those types of intersection are everywhere in my area, Two lanes at the light, only one survives about 200 feet ahead.

    My trick has always been to let them sit further up towards the line. I watch the opposing lane's traffic signal like a hawk and dump the clutch a little early so my motion starts just before the green. If you get a good headstart you can compensate for a lack of power. I've kind of outgrown that phase of my life, I was a true ricer with 18" chrome on a Honda Civic, so at one point I was trying to race any and everyone. Then as I got older, slower and everything became about just being more economical. But always, if I'm first and the light and you pull up on me, of course I'm going to floor it. If you are going to be in front of me I at least want to make sure you are moving fast.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Location
    Saskatoon, Canada
    Posts
    159
    My Cars
    B8.5 Audi S4, R320 cdi
    this gave me a good laugh.. thanks!
    Current: 2015 Audi S4 Sepang Blue, DSG, technik, black optic, sport diff, H&R Sport springs, Chipwerke Pro
    Past: 2001 ///M5 Imola Red/black, mk iv nav, black kidney grills, muffler delete with vibrant 1331 tips, shorty clutch stop, evolve alphaN tune
    e60 530i, e39 540i6, lots of modded audis.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    May 2017
    Location
    Pittsburgh
    Posts
    0
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    2014 535xi M Sport
    Quote Originally Posted by Logpile98 View Post
    Hey y'all this is not only my first post in Kill Stories, but this is my first post on bimmerforums! I've been lurking here a while and decided to share a fun little story from a few weeks ago. Hope y'all like it!

    So I'm leaving my apartment one Tuesday morning, going about business as usual. On my morning commute, there's this one stupid red light that's two lanes at the light, and then immediately after the intersection it narrows to one lane, and neither is designated as a turn only lane (gotta love Houston roads). So to avoid confusion and having to slam on the brakes, when I'm one of the first two at the light I make it my mission to dart out in front of the other car, and I always succeed.

    On this particular Tuesday, I'm the first one to the light, and I get in the left lane so people who wanna turn right are able to do so. This woman in a V6 Honda Accord pulls up to my right, and makes a point to be further forward than I am. I let it go, figuring she was turning right and just wanted to see around me, but no, she passed up multiple opportunities, and is still sitting there. It dawns on me that she expects to be in front of me when the light turns green, and I just can't let this happen. So I pull forward a bit more (I was a little behind the line, now my front tires are sitting on the far edge of the line). She responds by pulling forward more, determined to beat me.

    "Well alright," I say to myself. "If she wants a race I'll give her one. Even if she doesn't, I'm still giving her one." I push my bone stock 540i's autotragic into Sport mode (poor thing doesn't even have the Steptronic ). I look to my left at the pedestrian crosswalk counter, so I'll know when the light is about to turn green. A couple seconds before it does, I hold the brake firmer and give it a little gas. When the light turns green, I dump the brake and I'm gone! There's a little chirp from the back tires as my car's almost-300-hp engine attempts to break the mediocre traction provided by my 225s pawing for grip. I roll into the throttle at first and once I have a little more speed I push the pedal to the floor. I'm out in front before the end of the intersection. VANOS seems to kick in at 3500 rpm, and my lead grows as the road becomes one lane. By this point I'm going over 40 mph so I'm thankful for my e39's high speed stability. When the Honda looks like a Hot Wheels car in my mirror, only then do I lift.

    You might be thinking, "Congrats you beat a Honda Accord, whoopty-do", or "You idiot, this is why insurance rates for males under 25 are so high!" and you'd be right on both counts. But that doesn't matter. It also doesn't matter that she wasn't even trying to outrun me, or that she probably spent the rest of the day wondering what was wrong with that idiot in the BMW. Ask any ricer, any real ricer. It doesn't matter if the other guy's racing or not; a win's a win.
    Haha good read man. My biggest crux is when I see a big ass "coal roller" truck revving their engine at a light..I then make it my personal mission to show them that their truck isn't fast.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    New England
    Posts
    25,402
    My Cars
    F90 M5; E36 M3 Turbo
    I have seen diesel pickups run 110, 120, even 130 at the strip in the 1/4. There are a few out there that will surprise you.

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jul 2017
    Location
    USA
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    0
    My Cars
    Scoda
    I don't like your story please don't upload this such type of stories .

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